Doctor's confirm assumption: JoePa Old, needs new knee

Doctor's have confirmed that venerable Penn State coach Joe Paterno has some ligament damage and a fractured left tibia. The injury was sustained on an ill advised tackle on one of his own players. JoePa, use the body, not the knee to tackle. This is thought to be the first knee injury suffered by an 84 year old since about 3 minutes before the JoePa injury occurred. Contrary to previous reports, he won't be put out to pasture, but instead will be sharing a room with former champion horse Barbaro, who is also attempting a comeback after a severe leg fracture. Seriously though, we here wish the best of recoveries for JoePa, if only so we can watch him sprint with all abandon to the old man's room.